Confessions of a Techno Twit

I hate learning new technical stuff. Unfortunately, an unwillingness to learn new technical stuff these days will make you obsolete faster than your palm pilot can drop into your Jolt cola.

So it was good news for me when I signed up for the tech team at my church, operating the computer program that projects lyrics, scriptures, and whatever else the congregation needs to see onto the front screen. The software had not changed in ten years. Back then, I worked on staff at the church and used it weekly, setting up the Sunday schedules and even training others how to use it. A brief refresher and I was good to go.

But, as my dad used to say, “I learn to say yam and they change it to yelly.”

It was inevitable that just as I was getting comfortable, the church would purchase new software, requiring the team to learn not only a different program but one that operated on a Mac computer when all I’ve ever used is Windows.

The lovely Demi Moore as G.I. Jane

Oh, and did I mention? Not only am I the only female on this team, I am the oldest person on this team. I felt like a senior version of G.I. Jane going off to boot camp. (Well, except maybe for the shaved head, the one-handed push-ups, and the whole getting-the-snot-beat-out-of-me thing.)

“Soldier on,” I pep-talked myself. “What’s the worst that can happen? You mess up so bad that the huddled masses who intended to get right with God that Sunday change their minds, never to return? Don’t overestimate your own importance.”

The real fears had more to do with my prideful heart. Would I look like an idiot when I couldn’t catch on as fast as the 12-year-old training beside me? Break down crying in frustration? Make so many blunders they’d invite me to leave the team? 

All distinct possibilities. None life-threatening.

I attended the training session and found Jed Neudorf a great teacher. I didn’t cry, but I did return home with my head swimming. Now to work through the online tutorial videos. Soon I will be tested in an actual service. I’ll be as nervous as a nudist at the porcupine ball, but it will be worth it…eventually.

Here’s what I love most about serving in this capacity. Coming early to practice while the music team rehearses means I experience all the worship songs at least three times instead of only once, like the rest of the crowd. I learn the songs better and they stick in my head throughout the week. And that’s a good thing.

Praising God is always a good thing.

This week is Palm Sunday, the day Jesus rode triumphantly into Jerusalem while the people sang his praises, waving palm branches (symbols of victory, triumph, peace, and eternal life) and tossing their own coats in his path. “Hosanna!” they cried, which means “I beg you to save!” or “please deliver us!”

So, as Jesus rode the donkey into Jerusalem, the crowds were perfectly right to shout “Hosanna!” Theirs was a cry for salvation and a recognition that Jesus is able to save.

He deserves the same adoration from us. If you’re not already planning to attend Palm Sunday, Good Friday, or Easter services at another church, please join me at mine—Portage Alliance Church at 11:00 a.m. I can promise joyous music, a warm atmosphere, and an inspiring message.

And if the technology should fail… that whimpering sound you hear might just be me.