A Journey of Infertility and Faith, Part 4 of 4

To close this series, I asked Hannah and Eli Abrahams (not their real names) what “rejoicing” looks like in the middle of unanswered prayers and unrealized dreams. That may seem like a weird question. It comes from the book of Habakkuk in the Bible—a short book well worth your study time. The questions Habakkuk asks will resonate with you, and God’s answers will shake and solidify your faith.

For Hannah, rejoicing looks more like connection. “We feel rejuvenated and like we’ve rejoiced when we have connected deeply with people over a good meal, had an intimate chat over coffee, hosted guests who needed rest at our Airbnb, provided a detox and sober-living home for people who have become dear friends, and more. Rejoicing is connecting, through God’s favorably given grace, with others. This is why we are drawn to hospitality. The ability to facilitate connection with Creator in any way allows us to deepen our connection to Creator.”

I also asked Eli and Hannah what they would say to other couples struggling with infertility.

“This is hard. It’s never really going to be easy. It just won’t always be this hard. It will look different than you first thought, and that’s okay. It is real life and life is precious. Embrace and enjoy it. I promise you will find what sparked your heart in your first imagining if you are open to seeing it in a different package than you first thought.”

Doesn’t this ring true in every area of life? Whether we admit it or not, we all wonder sometimes where God is. How can He stand back and do nothing? Whether it’s our own personal unmet longings or the broken world around us, “How long?” and “Why?” are the questions we most often ask. Is your relationship with God such that you can challenge Him with your questions the way this couple has?

I asked Eli whether he has a particular Bible verse he clings to. Not surprisingly, he loves the passage where Paul wrote about Abraham. “Without weakening in his faith, Abraham acknowledged the decrepitude of his body (since he was about a hundred years old) and the lifelessness of Sarah’s womb. Yet he did not waver through disbelief in the promise of God, being fully persuaded that God was able to do what He had promised.” (Romans 4:19-21)

“Acknowledging our own physical issues is not considered weak faith,” Eli says. “Rather, seeing God do what He can do despite what we see, is faith. I’m not impressed by Abraham so much as I am impressed with God being faithful in our realities as we see them.”

When you began reading this series, did you expect it to end with the arrival of a baby? With one of God’s “great reversals?” Are you disappointed that it has not? Could it be that the faith required to rejoice in the middle of unanswered prayer is no less miraculous than the faith needed to see prayers answered?

When I look at Eli and Hannah’s journey thus far, I see God’s hand all over it. He promised pregnancy and there was one. He promised they would be parents, and they are, though they did not have the privilege of holding their little one in their arms. God is watching over their child who they’ll one day get to meet and know. Meanwhile, he’s giving them other young people to influence and mentor. Does God have more in store? Certainly. We don’t know what that will look like or how it will come about, but therein lies the precious beauty of a living faith.