Graduations that Never Were

I attended a wedding shower recently and heard the comment that invariably arises at these events, while guests admire all the shiny new gadgets and fluffy towels. “When you make it to forty years of marriage, you should be thrown a shower to replace all your worn-out stuff.” Having reached the 45-year milestone and still contending with several items in my kitchen of the same vintage, I heartily agree.

Okay, maybe I’m the one who made the comment.

But then I realized I’d need to attend showers and buy gifts for others on a weekly basis, using money I could use to replace my own stuff.

With graduation season upon us, similar thoughts occurred to me. What if we held grad ceremonies for accomplishments beyond school? A few categories come to mind.

Marriage and becoming a parent both typically include more parties, so I’ll skip those.

When parents graduate to empty-nesters, they are still parents but their roles change so significantly that some sort of ceremony might help. Graduating to “in-law” without any training or input deserves a diploma. Crossing the platform for your “grandparent” title is an even more significant milestone.

I know a woman who taught Sunday School for forty years. Last time I checked, teaching Sunday School did not come with a paycheck attached. I imagine she has learned at least as much as her students and probably a whole lot more. Surely that kind of dedication merits a cap and gown.

When seniors reach the point where they have little choice but to downsize, selling or giving away decades’ worth of memories, they deserve a graduation. Surrendering your car and driver’s license requires humility. When they possess the courage and dignity to make that call themselves rather than waiting until it’s forced upon them, they deserve some sort of recognition, don’t you think?

Maybe when you reach a certain age, you should be granted the privilege of participating in a “School of Hard Knocks” mass graduation ceremony simply for surviving your share of difficult surprises, health issues, relationship breakdowns, and heartaches too personal to share. A formal acknowledgment might give you a much-needed motivational boost to stay the course and finish your race.

Well ... again, I suppose we’d find ourselves attending grad ceremonies of one kind or another on a weekly basis if we did all this. Perhaps a better idea is to learn how to celebrate our own life moments and invite those closest to us to participate. As I look over my own history, I see too many significant events and accomplishments glossed over in the name of … I don’t even know what. Busyness? False humility? Laziness?

Birthdays. Anniversaries. Job changes. Book contracts. Course completions. Finishing the tax returns. What’s on your list? Can we do better at this? I’d sure like to.

Meanwhile, if you’re graduating from high school or college this year, Congratulations! Enjoy every minute of your festivities. Stay safe. And don’t forget all the people who helped get you there.

“So I conclude that, first, there is nothing better for a man than to be happy and to enjoy himself as long as he can; and second, that he should eat and drink and enjoy the fruits of his labors, for these are gifts from God.” (Ecclesiastes 3:12-13)